To do list- to father a son, to build | Jakub Stanek Polish Visual Artist

To do list - To father a son, to build a house, to plant a tree

2017-...

To Do List – To Father a Son, To Build a House, To Plant a Tree is a visual project exploring contemporary fatherhood and the redefinition of masculinity. As an actively involved father, I reflect on gender stereotypes and the systemic imbalance present in dominant models of parenting.

The project is rooted in a personal experience — a long legal process concerning the care of my son, which began with parental abduction and a sudden disruption of his everyday life. During this time, I found myself defending my role and competence as a father, instead of focusing on my child’s well-being. This became the starting point for questioning the role of the father and the limits of institutional perspectives on parenthood.

I approach the crisis of masculinity as a space for transformation — an opportunity to move beyond rigid roles and build a more empathetic and emotionally present model of fatherhood. The work focuses on vulnerability, intimacy, and the complexity of being a father today.

The images combine intimate moments from life with my son and symbolic scenes reflecting inherited stereotypes. Domestic spaces and everyday objects become metaphors for tension between social expectations and the need for closeness, care, and equality.

The project is also a reflection on the marginalization of fathers within legal and social systems. It suggests that fatherhood is not a checklist, but an ongoing process built on time, responsibility, and deep emotional connection.

To do list - To father a son, to build a house, to plant a tree

To Do List – To Father a Son, To Build a House, To Plant a Tree is a multi-layered visual project examining contemporary fatherhood and the transformation of masculinity through care, vulnerability, and emotional presence.

Drawing from autobiographical experience, the work reflects on the marginalization of fathers within social and legal systems that continue to privilege traditional caregiving models. The project emerged from a prolonged legal process following parental abduction, during which the artist was required to repeatedly justify his role as an equal caregiver. This experience became the foundation for a broader reflection on responsibility, power, and emotional labor in parenthood.

Combining photography, sculptural objects, installations, and collaborative works created with the artist’s son, To Do List constructs an intergenerational narrative that challenges inherited gender roles. Everyday gestures, domestic objects, and symbolic forms become metaphors for protection, repair, and the ongoing effort to build meaningful bonds between parent and child.